Dealing with mother-in-law is one of the tough tasks of any married lady. Unless she individually endorsed you, she can be a real headache to you. There are an exceptional small percent of wives co-existing peacefully with their mother-in-laws. However, a vast majority are either suffering in the hands of their mother-in-laws or taking their mother-in-laws through hell. Here are the reasons why many wives do not get along with their mother-in-laws.
Direct competition for the man’s resources and attention
Once a man is married, he automatically has two women fighting for his attention and resources. His mother wants to ensure resources keeps flowing in while his wife wants all that belongs to her husband. The mother needs the attention she used to have from her son while the wife wants undivided attention from her husband. Should there be a conflict; each party wants the man to side with them. As a result, enmity ensues between them. There is absolutely no way you can get along if you are directly competing for resources and attention from the same man. This can be through cold war between the two or direct confrontation.
The ties between the man and his mother
Marriage is the union of the man and woman to become one. Whenever there is such a union, the bond between mother and son has to be broken or weakened. That is a hard reality for the mothers to accept especially if they were close to their sons. Instead of seeing this as a normal process, some mothers take it like the wife is stealing her son from her. She then decides to fight back to maintain the bond with her son. In the process, she impairs her relationship with her daughter-in-law. Mama’s boys are the major causes of such issues.
The behavior of the lady or mother-in-law
Every mother has a preconceived picture of the kind of wife she wants for her son. There is a certain manner she wants her to behave, talk and dress. When the lady he finally marries falls short of her expectations, problems come in. If she does not approve you in the first place, getting along might be a nightmare. The same applies to wives. Sometimes the mother-in-law does not behave or treat her the way she expects, that too may bring bad blood between them.
The appearance and beauty
Just because you are beautiful, charming and attractive to your husband doesn’t mean your mother-in-law will also see you that way. Sometimes a man harvests what he considers the best and his mother views the same as the worst. You might be having issues with your mother-in-law simply because of your appearance. This may be because she sees you to be ugly or too beautiful for her son. There are mothers out there who think very beautiful ladies are bound to cheat on their sons.
The lady’s background or achievement
At times the problems between a mother-in-law and her son’s wife are due to her background or achievement. For instance, if a learned guy marries a lady who never went to school or dropped out at an early stage. There are parents who want their learned sons to marry learned ladies. Furthermore, should an employed guy marry an unemployed lady, some mothers might disapprove. They take it like the lady will be draining resources from their son without input. More so, the place or the family the lady comes from at times contributes to the disapproval by the mother-in-law. These reasons have made it hard for some wives to peacefully live in the same homestead with their mother-in-laws.