Dating should be mutually beneficial, enjoyable, supportive and adventurous. This is not to say that relationships are perfect. Neither does it mean am overlooking the fact that issues, fights and disagreements do happen.
How a relationship turns out is dependent on the commitment and willingness of the involved parties to make things work out. However, there are certain mistakes when committed will either compromise the success of a relationship, or lead to its termination.
Am going to present you with five common mistakes that usually happen in the dating arena and how to possibly avoid them
Being over dependent
A relationship is not a money generating venture. You cannot always be turning to your lover for rent, money for upkeep, shopping and so on. Responsibility in a relationship and assisting one another is fine but it has got limits.
Let your lover compliment you where you are stuck but not to wait for them to do everything for you. Over depending on someone makes them get tired with you easily and start avoiding you which leads to a break up. Just learn to make your own honest living and only seek help when absolutely necessary
Comparing your relationship to others
This can be in relation to other people’s relationships or your previous relationships. Two relationships can never and will never be the same. Every relationship is unique in its way and should be treated as such. A relationship can never offer 100% of what you seek. All you should do is grab the much you can get and forego what is missing.
Comparing relationships is like highlighting the shortcomings of your relationships.It only serves to decrease your satisfaction levels and brings the craving to move out of it. Simply embrace the fact that those other relationships have their problems too and work on building your relationship to the standards you want.
Expecting too much too soon
Whether you are entering a relationship with a broken heart or you have the strong conviction that you just met the love of your life, always keep your ambitions at bay. The bitter truth is those relationships you feel like they are straight from heaven delivered right by Angel Gabriel himself, they don’t even work out.You partner might not even be feeling anything closer to what you are feeling. Worse still might not have attached the same value you have attached to that relationship.
Do not push for proposals, introductions and marriage so soon. Let nature play its part. You only have to insure your heart, dedicate yourself to the relationship and hope the other party plays right into your expectations. Being too ambitious or expecting so much from your love will lead to disappointments if they fail to meet your expectations.
Being so much available
Remember the proverb: Absence makes the heart grow fonder?. Sometimes people think that being there whenever their lover wants them is a show of commitment, dedication and loyalty. The fact is, being a “yes person” and always available makes you look desperate, idle and boring.
Learn to have your own commitments and stick to them at times to allow your partner to miss you. When they miss you, they love you the more. You should not always be ready to forego your goals, plans and engagement to be with your lover unless they usually do so as well.
The biggest burden in a relationship is acting to be who you are not. Some people go to the extent of faking accents, borrowing outfits, moving to different apartments, lying about what they really do and even where they come from. Living a lie in a relationship deprives you off the sense of identity. You have to make sure what you do and say tally with who you are pretending to be. Such pretence never last long in a relationship and can easily be discovered and possibly break the relationship.
There is absolutely no fault in being who you really are. In fact it gives you the peace of mind. If someone is meant for you, no matter where you live, what you do or how you look like, there are not going anywhere else. If someone is not, even the best make up, designer clothes, latest car collections and world’s most expensive mansion will not keep them.